Well, there is hope in my life, or should I say "Hope" in my life. On May 6th at 1:22 am in the Foothills hospital, Hope Kelly Andrews was born. She came quickly. Heather's water broke at only 10 pm, and within an hour of arriving at the hospital out came our new little girl. This birth felt different for me, likely due to a combination of being the second time instead of the first, it happening so quickly, and having to coordinate things with Barbara as well. Incidentally Barbara loves her little sister. I hope (Hope? Yup, there will be a lifetime of Hope puns) that continues as they grow older. Heather is doing great and is once again showing me how strong she is and how caring and nurturing a person she has always been.
May has become yet again an important month for me. Yesterday we had an open house for Hope. Many great friends and family and came to say hi. I always enjoy opening my home to company and it was no different this time around. It was nice to see almost twenty friends and family take a few moments out of their busy Saturday to say hi and hold a little Hope in their arms (yeah, definitely a lifetime of puns). In the evening, Heather mentioned that she came across a journal of mine with an entry from May 24, 2001. It was the day my mother passed away. I had to stop for a moment because for the first time that date slipped my mind. I will always remember that day and that it happened in May, but I honestly had forgotten to mark the event mentally until Heather reminded me. I'm not certain how I feel about this. I do not expect that my mother would want me to fixate on her passing every year at this time. For the first few years it was so, but that was more of the healing process then anything else. Usually I would remember her, say a quick prayer about her, and continue on with the rest of the day. Not this year. Has the wound of her passing finally healed? Do I want it to be fully healed? I still miss her, and I am grateful to have my eldest daughter named after her, but is it right that I had forgotten about the day? I cannot answer those questions. I do not know if this is a failing on my part or not. I have felt the loss of loved ones since, but she is and likely will be the keenest felt loss. I can only imagine Heather or one of my little girls hitting me harder.
Don't get me wrong, I am not spending countless hours at night mulling this through my mind. I just make note of it, process it, resolve what I can, and leave the rest for another time when my understanding becomes more apparent. In no way do I love my mother less. I indeed think of her on an almost daily basis, especially watching her granddaughters grow. I guess I am leaning towards the idea that I no longer feel that I "have" to remember the day my mother passed to honour her memory. Instead, I continue to live my life in a way that honours her memory. I remember the day one of her former students came by to visit us. It really impacted me to see that decades after being in her classroom this lady still felt a connection to my mother. I believe that is one of the reasons why I have tried to establish connections with all of my students. I also cannot forget that it was my mother who taught me to love Star Trek. Yup, it's all her fault. I'll expand on this more (as it is in the title), but I always found it fitting that they evening before she died she watched the series finale of Star Trek Voyager. The crew that she had faithfully watched for seven years finally made it home, and that night she was called home.
So, why Star Trek? Well, in addition to May 23 being Voyager's finale, it was also the 20th anniversary of the final episode of The Next Generation. I have always loved this franchise, and again, my mother is to thank for that. I have many people try to debate with me the reasons why Trek is so wonderful and my favourite, but it is not about the quality of the shows (although they are high quality indeed) or even the message of hope for the future. My reasons are much more personal. Star Trek was a family tradition. Every week while TNG and DS9 were on the air we would gather together in the family room. Creation Entertainment would run conventions in Edmonton twice a year during the heyday, and often the family would go. T.J. took the whole family on a Trek Cruise during my mission as a Make-A -Wish event. Since Mom passed away my family has become a bit more fractured. T.J.'s passing added to that as well. Despite efforts on many people's parts, I really only feel close to my father (and Vi) and Tara. Life and different choices have put distance between the rest and myself, and try as I may I have not been able to bridge those distances. So when I miss the members of my family who I have not seen in a long time and nothing else is able to help, there are several DVDs I can pop into the machine and help me remember some fond memories.
So, in honour of TNG's finale, I present my Top Ten Favourite TNG episodes. However, an occasion like this cannot be marked like this without the honorable mentions. For this list, I went through the list of entire episodes and identified any that I thought could make the cut. Two part episodes are counted as one. The honorable mentions (in order of broadcast) are: Skin of Evil, Sarek, Brothers, Qpid, Darmok, Disaster, I Borg, Rascals, Tapestry, Face of the Enemy, Starship Mine, Descent, and Genesis. Now, the tougher part was deciding on the Top Ten's order. Here is what I have:
10. Conspiracy - This was a neat little first season episode. I am not a fan of gratuitous violence, but I have to say watching a guy's head explode on TV was cool. I really wish they had followed this up in later seasons.
9. Lower Decks - After ranking a first season episode, it seems fitting to have a final season episode next. The TNG episodes often revolved around the senior officers (understandably so), and they often brought in reoccurring characters such as Barclay, Ogawa, O'Brien, etc. to round out how the ship was really a ship of over 1000 people. Lower Decks to me was an episode about the little guys. It tied in a few story lines from earlier episodes but showed what I think most of fans would have loved to experience: being a part of the crew.
8. The Measure of a Man - From Season 2 this episode, in my eyes, showed the first real strength in using great story telling and character development while at the same time providing social commentary. Powerful performances from Brent Spiner, Patrick Stewart, and Johnathon Frakes helped push this episode to the #8 spot.
7. Unification - Not only do we get another great performance from Mark Leonard as Sarek, but we finally get to see Leonard Nimoy reprise his monumental role of Spock on TNG. This was a highly anticipated two-part story that sadly aired just after the death of Trek creator Gene Roddenberry (both episodes were dedicated to him) but also weeks before Star Trek VI, and provided a great hype for the new film. Throw in Sela (Denise Crosby) and a Data-Spock tag team and you have a whole lot of fun.
6. Relics - Always a fan favourite, Relics returns James Doohan as Scotty to the Trek world. For me this episode is great not just because of the connections made between TNG and the Original series but because the central TNG character was my favourite Geordi La Forge, the blind chief engineer, who sadly was rarely the main focus of any episode. Yes, it made sense that Geordi and Scotty would team up, but it is nice to see that they did so in a great way.
5. The Inner Light - OK, it's getting tough now. A lot of fans may start to cry foul that this timeless classic episode only made it #5 and not the Top 3, but I have my reasons for ranking others higher. Suffice it to say even if you are not a Trek fan, this episode is one that almost anyone can enjoy. Again, it shows how great Trek can be when the focus on telling good stories. The special effects and cool moments all take a back seat to a good story and this episode shows that such effects are not necessary.
4. Yesterday's Enterprise - One of the best time-travel/alternate universe stories that brought back my beloved Denise Crosby back as Tasha Yar. Now, I mentioned in the last one that special effects are not necessary when you have a great story, but this episode had both and were used effectively. I also like the foundations that were set for future stories, from minor things such as Worf drinking prune juice to big surprises such as the blond half-human Romulan Sela. I wish they could have shown more of how the Enterprise D crew met their fates during the final battle (apparently they were supposed to kill Wesley and Data), but it is exciting.
3. The Best of Both Worlds - I don't care about who shot JR or Mr. Burns, or who survived the terrorist attack in Dynasty, or even the Season 3 finale of LOST, this is THE BEST season cliffhanger of all time. Great development. The only thing that keeps it from higher was the slightly weaker part 2.
2. All Good Things - Definitely the best series finale in not only Trek history but in almost all of TV. It bookends the series with beauty and logic, reuniting old fan favorites like Tomalak, O'Brien, Yar, and of course, Q. I always wished that they would have done a movie with Q, but if this is as close as they will ever get, then I am satisfied with it. The end scene with the poker game is brilliantly executed and is a nice way to lead us into the TNG movies.
1. The Offspring - I can already hear fellow Trekkies questioning this choice of Data creating a daughter being #1 so let me explain. This is MY favourite list. I readily admit that if I were to rank the best episodes I would place it lower (but still top ten). What gives it the top spot for me is two things. First, there is a line that Data gives as he expresses to his daughter Lal about why he strives to be human when he will never accomplish the goal. He says that it is the journey that one makes that is important, not the actual destination. As a young man it struck a cord with me that resonates to this day. The second is the love a father has for his child. As I grew older and became a father, this episode has come to mean a great deal more to me and cements itself at the top spot.
Sunday, May 25, 2014
Sunday, May 4, 2014
Hello Little One
Well, the last couple nights Heather has been having contractions or Braxton Hicks (which sounds like a runner-up on American Idol), so I guess the new addition is not too far off. Again, like in March, I might as well get a jump on this month's post before the baby arrives and chaos ensues.
That I mind the chaos. It is a lot of fun, actually, and it puts my life in better perspective. Just as I began this entry, my beloved wife and darling little daughter were dancing in circles right in front of me. At this moment they are in Barbara's new room reading funny stories. Yes, Barbara is in a Big Girl bed. She has been moved into Dustin's old room (he moved downstairs) and is definitely not a baby anymore. The chaos involved in having children can be hectic and frazzling, but it is definitely full of grand rewards. The smiles and laughter are evident, but there is something else about being "Daddy" that is just as rewarding. Last night, or more accurately at 3:30 this morning, I was jolted awake by my little girl's crying. She had woken up in the dark, reached out to the lamp beside her bed, and promptly fell out. She was more scared than hurt, but her screams were definitely heard. I made it to her side in about three seconds, and had her in my arms where she snuggled in close and cried and wailed. This is not the first time I have come running to her rescue at night. There have been some nightmares and times when she was just afraid of the dark. Each time Daddy was there to hold her and comfort her, and while I was not happy that she was upset, I was happy that she could find safety and warmth in my arms.
Why is it that such moments are so precious to me? I have thought long and hard about this as we prepare for the new little miracle to arrive. Whenever a new child arrives in the family I suppose that it is only natural for the parents to look back on their past experiences to help them make better choices in raising the new one, and at the same time know that nothing will ever be like the other times. I'm not saying that I messed up royally with Barbara, but instead I look to what I did well and see what I can duplicate to close to the same relationship with this child. I have hopes and dreams for all of my children, and one that is foremost is that they will always know they can find love and acceptance in my arms. True, as with all children there will be times when I disapprove of their choices, but that will not change my desire to always be there for them. It is this drive to always have my arms represent comfort and strength, joy and security to my children that governs much of my parenting. Again, I wonder why that is.
It is obvious to me that my parents are a big influence. I know that from the time I was born until the day that she passed that my mother would have moved heaven and hell to protect, love, and bless me. I have missed her so much these last 13 years, and want to provide her grandchildren with all that she tried to provide for me. In her arms I found warmth strength. My father, while in his own special way, has been no different in how I have felt about him. Some say that fathers and sons can more easily clash, and we did not always see eye to eye on everything, but in the end I knew where I stood with him. My parents often worried about my future (I sometimes overheard their conversations pertaining to such things), but I always felt supported. Whenever the hard, challenging, and scary parts of life came knocking at my door, they could always be counted on. I suppose a part of me wants to pay their love forward and by doing so honor what they have done for me in the process.
Some of the more cynical view would argue that my desire is rooted in a selfish desire to bring meaning and worth to my life. I would be lying if I said that parenthood does not reap such rewards for me, but I would hardly call parenting selfish. Like most things there are different elements of parenting that appeal to some and not to others. Very rarely do I see good, thoughtful, and intentional parenting as being "selfish". Sacrifice makes the rewards that much sweeter, and what is wrong with finding meaning and worth in life anyways? Why is it selfish to have joy in raising a family? Those that have argued this would say that making themselves good people, successful in every aspect of their lives is a great way of bringing such feelings of fulfillment. I personally believe that making something positive of your life, regardless of how you do it, is worthy. I just feel that being a good parent is one of the most wonderful ways to do this.
So while Heather walks around the bedroom sighing and wishing that this bundle of joy will come quickly, I look forward to greeting my new progeny (This is not meant to contrast my wife and I. She has earned every sigh, moan, and expression of fatigue over these last nine months). I look forward to how the new child will fit into the family.
For my Top Ten List, I'll go in a different direction. Because today is May 4th (Star Wars Days), I give you my Top Ten Favourite Star Wars Moments/Characters.
10. Busting Han Solo out of Jabba's palace. The whole opening plot line in Return of the Jedi was just plain awesome.
9. Chewbacca. Everyone's favourite wookie. As a kid I loved that giant walking carpet.
8. Ewoks. When I saw them on the big screen as a kid, I had no problem with the fact that the Empire was overthrown by walking teddy bears. As a kid who was constantly picked on it was nice to see the little guy save the day.
7. Pod race from Episode I. One of the few really good moments in the first movie. Lots of excitement.
6. Anthony Daniels. He is the actor who plays C-3PO in all 6 movies. I met him last week at the Comic Expo. He was great. When he found out that my nephew Connor could not afford his autograph he gave one to him free of charge.
5. "Luke. I am your father". One of the biggest movie surprises and plot twists of all time!
4. Luke Skywalker. Sure, many see him as bratty in IV, but he grew up and became one that I felt the most akin to.
3. The Cantina band song. To this day I can't help but tap my toes along with the beat.
2. Vader's redemption. Darth Vader was the baddest bad guy in cinema, and he was able to turn from the dark side and be redeemed. There is hope for us all.
1. Yoda. The green guru, the wisest of the wise, Yoda was Da Man!. He had the best lines and in Episode II showed he could kick serious butt.
One last little surprise. One of my favourite YouTube channels is How It Should Have Ended. Here is one of my favourites.
That I mind the chaos. It is a lot of fun, actually, and it puts my life in better perspective. Just as I began this entry, my beloved wife and darling little daughter were dancing in circles right in front of me. At this moment they are in Barbara's new room reading funny stories. Yes, Barbara is in a Big Girl bed. She has been moved into Dustin's old room (he moved downstairs) and is definitely not a baby anymore. The chaos involved in having children can be hectic and frazzling, but it is definitely full of grand rewards. The smiles and laughter are evident, but there is something else about being "Daddy" that is just as rewarding. Last night, or more accurately at 3:30 this morning, I was jolted awake by my little girl's crying. She had woken up in the dark, reached out to the lamp beside her bed, and promptly fell out. She was more scared than hurt, but her screams were definitely heard. I made it to her side in about three seconds, and had her in my arms where she snuggled in close and cried and wailed. This is not the first time I have come running to her rescue at night. There have been some nightmares and times when she was just afraid of the dark. Each time Daddy was there to hold her and comfort her, and while I was not happy that she was upset, I was happy that she could find safety and warmth in my arms.
Why is it that such moments are so precious to me? I have thought long and hard about this as we prepare for the new little miracle to arrive. Whenever a new child arrives in the family I suppose that it is only natural for the parents to look back on their past experiences to help them make better choices in raising the new one, and at the same time know that nothing will ever be like the other times. I'm not saying that I messed up royally with Barbara, but instead I look to what I did well and see what I can duplicate to close to the same relationship with this child. I have hopes and dreams for all of my children, and one that is foremost is that they will always know they can find love and acceptance in my arms. True, as with all children there will be times when I disapprove of their choices, but that will not change my desire to always be there for them. It is this drive to always have my arms represent comfort and strength, joy and security to my children that governs much of my parenting. Again, I wonder why that is.
It is obvious to me that my parents are a big influence. I know that from the time I was born until the day that she passed that my mother would have moved heaven and hell to protect, love, and bless me. I have missed her so much these last 13 years, and want to provide her grandchildren with all that she tried to provide for me. In her arms I found warmth strength. My father, while in his own special way, has been no different in how I have felt about him. Some say that fathers and sons can more easily clash, and we did not always see eye to eye on everything, but in the end I knew where I stood with him. My parents often worried about my future (I sometimes overheard their conversations pertaining to such things), but I always felt supported. Whenever the hard, challenging, and scary parts of life came knocking at my door, they could always be counted on. I suppose a part of me wants to pay their love forward and by doing so honor what they have done for me in the process.
Some of the more cynical view would argue that my desire is rooted in a selfish desire to bring meaning and worth to my life. I would be lying if I said that parenthood does not reap such rewards for me, but I would hardly call parenting selfish. Like most things there are different elements of parenting that appeal to some and not to others. Very rarely do I see good, thoughtful, and intentional parenting as being "selfish". Sacrifice makes the rewards that much sweeter, and what is wrong with finding meaning and worth in life anyways? Why is it selfish to have joy in raising a family? Those that have argued this would say that making themselves good people, successful in every aspect of their lives is a great way of bringing such feelings of fulfillment. I personally believe that making something positive of your life, regardless of how you do it, is worthy. I just feel that being a good parent is one of the most wonderful ways to do this.
So while Heather walks around the bedroom sighing and wishing that this bundle of joy will come quickly, I look forward to greeting my new progeny (This is not meant to contrast my wife and I. She has earned every sigh, moan, and expression of fatigue over these last nine months). I look forward to how the new child will fit into the family.
For my Top Ten List, I'll go in a different direction. Because today is May 4th (Star Wars Days), I give you my Top Ten Favourite Star Wars Moments/Characters.
10. Busting Han Solo out of Jabba's palace. The whole opening plot line in Return of the Jedi was just plain awesome.
9. Chewbacca. Everyone's favourite wookie. As a kid I loved that giant walking carpet.
8. Ewoks. When I saw them on the big screen as a kid, I had no problem with the fact that the Empire was overthrown by walking teddy bears. As a kid who was constantly picked on it was nice to see the little guy save the day.
7. Pod race from Episode I. One of the few really good moments in the first movie. Lots of excitement.
6. Anthony Daniels. He is the actor who plays C-3PO in all 6 movies. I met him last week at the Comic Expo. He was great. When he found out that my nephew Connor could not afford his autograph he gave one to him free of charge.
5. "Luke. I am your father". One of the biggest movie surprises and plot twists of all time!
4. Luke Skywalker. Sure, many see him as bratty in IV, but he grew up and became one that I felt the most akin to.
3. The Cantina band song. To this day I can't help but tap my toes along with the beat.
2. Vader's redemption. Darth Vader was the baddest bad guy in cinema, and he was able to turn from the dark side and be redeemed. There is hope for us all.
1. Yoda. The green guru, the wisest of the wise, Yoda was Da Man!. He had the best lines and in Episode II showed he could kick serious butt.
One last little surprise. One of my favourite YouTube channels is How It Should Have Ended. Here is one of my favourites.
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