Thanks to Facebook, I was reminded of an important event so long ago. On this day in 2008 I made the move from Thunderchild First Nations Saskatchewan to Calgary Alberta. I loaded up my beloved Annie into a U-Haul truck and made the long drive to my sister's house in Scenic Acres. It amazes me still how much my life has changed. Before I do that, a quick refresher of where I was.
Eight years ago my life was in shambles. I was coming to grips with an approaching divorce. I felt I could not stay where I was, and for months I was searching for work in Alberta. To be honest, Calgary was the last place in Alberta I wanted to be (OK, second last. I really didn't want to end up anywhere north of Edmonton), but as job prospects dried up, I found that the only place I could go was the basement of my sister's house. I swallowed what little pride I had left, and moved in. I had no job, no car, no home, no marriage, nothing. It was one of the lowest points in my life. I did have my beloved dog, Annie, a storage unit full of stuff, and a sister who along with her family let me live with them. Without them, I really have no idea where I would have ended up. Likely on the street.
Looking back at that time, I marvel at the lessons I have learned since. I learned the importance of dealing with loss head on. I started counseling, which was so beneficial to my healing. I learned that helping and serving others is a great way to help yourself heal. I learned that giving to a community is a perfect way to feel connected to it. I learned that hurt does heal, and while scars sometimes remain, they can serve as a reminder of how fortunate you are to still be here. I learned that accepting the generosity of others is neither a strength nor a weakness, but it is a necessity of life sometimes. I learned that when you put your faith and trust in God, He will not always take you where you want to go, but you will always end up where you need to be. I learned to have confidence in myself, to see me for who I really am. I started to discover that me that so many people knew, yet somehow I could not remember.
I learned that when you need a certain someone in your life, that person will be there. Many times that person is family, and I can say that during this time I was blessed with supportive family. My sister, Tara, and her husband, Bryan, were the most supportive, and the debt I owe them will never be repaid. Their children were, for several years, the closest thing I had to children of my own, and still feel that way to me. My father and stepmother, though they lived far away at the time, were as supportive as ever.
Other people come from the past. Friends who had been there for decades (Dan Oler and Matt Harker especially) were still having my back. Old mission companions and buddies would be there. I am thinking of the blessing of finding that one such companion, Eric Bly, and his family lived close to where I was. They would invite me over for their family get togethers. At a time when I needed friendship and a wee bit of a social life, they were there. I discovered that through social networks like Facebook, other friends from my university days would be there. People who influenced me during my childhood and teens would show up, being able to say the right thing at the right time. The relationships we nurture today may very well result in the biggest pay-offs well into the future.
Other people that helped me through this I had yet to meet. My ward was so vital. Right away my bishop gave me confidence by extending a calling in seminary. While I was only able to serve in that capacity for a few months it was so necessary that I was teaching again. I met one of the nicest guys in the world, and thanks to an inspired Elder's Quorum president, we became home teaching companions. The fact that we were both single may have been a factor, but Ricardo Perez quickly became a good friend. It was because of him that I was able to get out and start meeting other single people in the church.
Church was not the only blessing. It was not long before I was subbing, and by the end of October I was teaching at Sir Winston Churchill High School. Deb Miller saw something in me that helped me come out of my shell as a teacher, and the students there were great. While I have forgotten many of their names, I definitely remember how they trusted me coming into their classroom, their fourth teacher in 6 weeks, and learned. In January I was offered a full time probationary contract at FFCA high school, and while I was sad to leave Churchill, I needed something more permanent. Since February of 2009 I have had the immense joy of working with this charter school, and I have loved it all. My colleagues have been and still are among the best in the world. I have formed friendships with people that are so different from myself and yet I feel such a strong kinship to. They have offered me friendship, feedback, support, encouragement, and hope. They cheered me on in my successes and hugged me during my hardships. I have seen this school grow and thrive, and I am hoping that this will be my last school that I work at. It is at FFCA that I have had the immense honor of interacting with some of the most inspiring students that exist. When I see these young men and women walk across the stage at graduation, I feel mixed emotions. I feel joy knowing that they are going to make the world a little bit better, yet sadness that there place in my life will most likely diminish into a fond memory and the odd Facebook connection. Nothing overjoys me more than seeing our graduates come back to the school for a visit.
Of course, the biggest blessing waiting for me in Calgary was a pretty brunette mother of two who was also seeing the end to her first marriage. Though some may argue, I will always believe that Divine Intervention brought Heather and I together. While the saddest, hardest day of my life happened over eight years ago, I must express gratitude that it happened, for it led me to the greatest day of my life almost six years ago. Marrying Heather was and likely will always be the greatest and smartest thing I have ever done. Not only did I marry the perfect fit for me, but I have been able to see the most fulfillment in my life because of her. Her sons are my boys. Our daughters have brought me so much joy (while at the same time so much pleasant frustration). If nothing else, coming to Calgary was what I needed because it is here that my ultimate goal of becoming a father and husband was finally realized. All the pain in life is nothing compared to this great happiness.
So for this anniversary of sorts, I want to pay tribute to all the people who have helped me along the difficult path that sometimes is life. From the volunteers at the Calgary Zoo to the Rockyview Ward to the kids in my science and biology classes; from friends who are still in touch to those who have lost touch to those who have left this world; to family near and far, whether by blood, adoption, or marriage, I thank all of you. Mostly, to my beloved wife and eternal companion, I thank you for your love and compassion.
Eight years ago I came to Calgary with a broken soul and a beaten heart.
Eight years later, I call this city home, stronger and happier than I have ever been.
Eight years from now, who knows? Can't wait to find out.
