There are all sorts of friends out there. Best friends, casual friends, soul mates, kindred spirits, buddies, blokes, even Facebook friends. Some friends come, some go, some stay with you long after they are gone. There are many theories on how to make, earn, and keep friends. There are many songs and poems written on the subject. The support of a friend can be the one difference maker during a crisis. The let down of a friend can be among the most painful of hurts. The love of a friend can make a dark world seem bright as day, while the betrayal of a friend can devastate one beyond consolation. Epictetus said "In prosperity it is very easy to find a friend; in adversity, nothing is so difficult." Samuel Johnson wisely stated f a man does not make new acquaintances as he passes through life, he will soon find himself alone. A man should keep his friendships in constant repair." A Nigerian proverb advises to "Hold a true friend with both hands", while an Assyrian proverb says "Tell me your friends, and I'll tell you who you are".
I have been fortunate with friends. I have not always had many, but the ones that I do have are precious to me. My best friend in elementary school was a kid by the name of Mark Miller. I remember him initially as the kid that stayed in at recess to eat glue. Maybe that was why he stuck with me when the bullying started. In high school, I was lucky to have a couple close friends from church: Matt Harker and Dan Oler, who are still good friends today. Their wives have also become trusted friends to me. I am truly lucky to see many of my family members, including my parents, become friends. There are several at church and work who are friends, and others that have come in and out of my life over the years that have been great friends. Of course, my best friend would be my beloved Heather, and I hope that Barbara and Kid #2 will also develop into friendships as they get older.
I know that all friendships change over time. Sometimes people drift apart. Sometimes the friendship was only on the surface, and that was fine for what it was. There are times when people move into different phases of their lives, and many of the friends do not move on with them. Circumstances change, contact becomes infrequent, and absence makes the heart fonder. Despite this, when those connections become reestablished, the friendship picks up where it left off, with many stories to exchange in the name of catching up. It is important to work at maintaining friendships, but keep in mind that change is natural and relationships of any kind evolve.
It is this thought of friendship that causes me to reflect on one unexpected and very rewarding friendship that has grown over the last few years. Five years ago I started full time teaching science at FFCA High School. Many of the staff members there quickly came to mean a great deal to me as they were welcoming and supportive. I have had great relationships with many of them during those five years, but there is one that I wish to touch on today. A few weeks into my tenure, I was heading to the parking lot for the drive home when this teacher in the English department introduced herself to me. We talked for several minutes, and for some strange reason I felt like going into the whole reason for my coming to Calgary. It amazed me that I was so comfortable talking to her about this. It became apparent that we had much in common. Over the next few months and into the next few years, I came to value the friendship of one Pamela Hunnisett.
Pam, or Hunni as I call her, is a rare individual indeed. Over the last five years I have learned what great gifts and talents she has. She is one of those people who will listen to anybody's point of view. She may not share it, but she will validate it with you. She gives great advice and exudes a wisdom that is sound and refreshing. She has a heart of gold and the mouth of a sailor. She loves her students as if they were her own, and many of them think of her as "Mom". This allows her to be able to say things to them that may be hard to hear from other teachers, but because it comes from her they are more receptive to the feedback. She is even more devoted to her own family. She is a sought after expert on the use of blogs in teaching and has made several presentations on the matter. She is a favourite teacher of many students (and even among teachers). She has many passions, including reading, drama, and creative writing. It was Hunni that helped me on the road to confronting, processing, and finally healing the experiences of my youth that I have carried with me for many years. It was Hunni that saw a place for me in the One Act program of our school. It was Hunni that suggested that I play the part of Chef Louis in this year's production of the Little Mermaid. She is an anchor to me in this world. In one week she will leave for a six month leave in Argentina. I will miss her during that time. I will miss popping by at the end of the day to chat or watch her in action as she helps students become better writers. I will the moments when she gets to spend some time with Barbara (mutual adoration with those two). So much I will miss, but I know how valuable this time will be for her, so I will be content that it will only be for six months (you hear that Hunni? ONLY 6 MONTHS!)
So, in her honor, and since she is such a fan of my sweet little Barbie, I give you the Top Ten list of Cute Things Barbara Has Said in the Past Ten Days (or so):
10. "Star Wars Colors!". One of her new favorite books.
9. "Bye bye. See you later!" She says this to practically everyone when they leave the house, room, etc.
8. "Yummy!" said everytime she has blueberries, toast and jam, and chocolate.
7. "No no no no no no". Her response to the questions "What does Mommy/Daddy/Dustin/Dayton say?"
6. "Blah blah dah dah HI!" is what she says when she reads the book "Effie the Ant" to herself.
5. "Oooo, tasty!" Said tonight when I gave her potatoes.
4. "Big!" (said loudly and deep) "Little! (said softly and high pitched). This is her reading the Star Trek Book of Opposites when we get to the page that has "big" and "little" on it.
3. "Manamana. Doo doo doo doo". Yup, watching Muppet Show with her is paying off.
2. "Night night sleep!". She says this when she curls herself up on big giraffe pillow. It is usually accompanied by fake snoring sounds.
1. When I asked her what different animals say, she is pretty good. A week ago, however, I asked her what a frog says, instead of her usual "Rib-bit" she says "YAY!". Yup, watching those Muppet Show episodes with her is definitely paying off.
